Dog and Pony Show

On an otherwise dreary Saturday with rain in the forecast and no where in particular to go Rhiana and I decided to practice some dancing for the wedding. I queued up the music files in the computer, spun the volume control up, and guided my mouse to the virtual “play key.”

“I think we should use this one.” I told Rhiana. “Let’s dance!”

I can’t imagine what our dogs must have thought of us. It must be alarming for them to see their masters with bodies flailing about, going back and forth towards each other, and interlocking arms. It was obvious that both dogs were in a tizzy over the situation. They did not approve.

Letting us know what he thought, Buca scurried off the couch, approached cautiously, and let out a scrappy growl. Enraged he spun around, tucked his tail down, and bolted to the other end of our basement living room. He found quickly that there was little room to run and he turned and raced back to us. The shiny black coat along his neck and back was standing on end. He furiously retrieved toys out of the bluish plastic tote that is his toy box. He flung fuzz-less tennis balls and decaying “indestructible” toys about in an attempt to draw our attention.

Rhiana reached out her hand to let him know everything was going to be “OK.”

It was too late; he had already spun around and was headed for another lap through the basement.

At first Kayla thought we were playing. A dog’s natural reaction to a playing situation is to get in the “puppy play stance.” (That’s when the dog crouches down with their front legs, but their hind legs remain standing. Basically it’s how puppies tell other puppies that it is time to play.) Kayla tried the “stance” three or four times to let us know she wanted to be involved too. When her attempts to play went unrequited she too became nervous like Buca had. She frantically turned sideways and attempted to separate us by squeezing in between. She burrowed between us with her nose and put all 65 or so pounds of her body into me first. Realizing that we were unfazed, she started “plan B” for getting our attention…jumping.

“Kayla!”...I barked, commanding her audience.

“No jumping!!!”

Immediately her front paws stuck to the floor and she ran over to Buca, barking objectionably.

“Should we stop?” I asked Rhiana.

Laughing she said back, “No, they’ll get over it.”

“I hope the reception isn’t this chaotic!”

By this time the dogs had joined forces and were side by side and barking in unison, alternately, and…could it be?...

“Are they barking to the music?” I joked.

Having enough of the situation, Buca scampered through another lap and upon return lurched into Kayla. Poor Kayla not only had been reprimanded for jumping, but now had been the target of a run-by-dogging. Confused and uncertain she went back to barking at us and started growling at Buca.

“They’re going to sleep well tonight, huh?” Rhiana pointed out to me.

I replied, “It would be hard for them not to. Maybe we should practice a few more songs?”

“Jesus, this song goes on forever.” Rhiana said after about the fourth or fifth chorus. “How long is it?”

I danced over to the glowing flat screen that was displaying a list of media files. “It says here about two and a half minutes.”

With her cheeks turning red Rhiana said back, “Two and a half minutes? It feels like we’ve been doing this forever. The dogs are losing their freaking minds!”

Clicking the virtual “pause” key I concluded the dance. “Yes, let’s stop.”

The dogs were still unsettled although the music stopped. Buca pranced back towards the couch to pick up a rubber ring. He continued moaning and whining the entire way to and from. With her tail spinning in circles like the blade of a helicopter, Kayla stopped barking, raised her head up, and moved forward cautiously towards Rhiana.

“OHHHH…its OK Kayla.” Rhiana said sitting down in one of our reading chairs. Kayla leaned in and continued wagging her tail as if she were cracking a whip.

“Buca, get over here!” I said corralling him into my lap while sitting in the creaky desk chair. He put his head down on my knee and let out a short grunt as if to voice his final statement of disapproval.

I looked over to Rhiana consoling Kayla back to the usual level of activity.

Rhiana smiled looking in my direction, “I guess they don’t like the chicken dance.”

I guess not.